Great is Thy faithfulness,
Oh God,
my Father
There is no
shadow of turning with Thee
Thou changest not,
Thy compassions,
they fail not
As Thou hast been,
Thou forever wilt be

{favorite "blanky" in the sunlight}

Summer and winter and springime and harvest
Sun,
moon,
and stars in their courses above
Join with all
nature in manifold witness
To Thy great faithfulness,
mercy,
and love

{bedhead}

Great is Thy faithfulness
Great is Thy faithfulness
Morning by morning
New mercies I see
All I have needed
Thy hand
hath provided
Great is Thy faithfulness
Lord,
unto me

{french toast}

{no leaves yet, but i'll take sunshine!}

Pardon for sin,
and a peace that endureth
Thine own dear
presence to cheer and to guide
Strength for today and
bright hope for tomorrow
Blessings all mine,
with ten
thousand beside

Blogging: God in the Yard Chapter 2

In Chapter 2: Rules: The Way in L.L. Barkat's book God in the Yard: Spiritual practice for the rest of us L.L. explores the phrase: "Whose job is it to make sure we don't fall into nothing?" In her observation of back yard cardinals in her small space, L.L. witnesses the baby cardinal learn how to fly:

"I've heard it said that when it's time for baby birds to fly, their no-nonsense mamas knock them out of the nest. Maybe some fledgling somewhere must put up with such heavy-handed (or beaked?) techniques. But I recently learned from an avian specialist that for most baby birds it comes to a matter of internal readiness. Feathers grow long, muscles grow strong, bodies plump up, and it's time. The baby walks out ready to try her wings. Sometimes she makes her way, branch by branch, down to the ground. Or she might dive like an Olympic hopeful, gliding a bit if she's lucky, or enduring a crash landing if the breeze doesn't quite go her way." ~L.L. Barkat "God in the Yard" p. 13

In her quest to discover spiritual disciplines not "by the book", L.L. is struck by a friend's comment: "Many Christians around the world hear God and it's not through reading the Bible."

Which begs the question: "What is the best way to "hear God"?" L.L. seems to discover, through her own "spiritual discipline" of sitting outside in the same place every day for a year, (a discipline in itself) that there are ways beyond the "tried and true" disciplines of solitude, silence, prayer, meditation, study, service and sacrifice.

For me, there is freedom within those disciplines. What it looks like for another may be different for me. I find that in my dailiness as a mother, that I can experience all of those spiritual disciplines in my common, ordinary life without resorting to a cloistered life. It does take intentional living to do that, and perhaps in the end, that is the spiritual discipline in itself: intentionality.

"In the end, this is the most hopeful thing any of us can say about spiritual transformation: I cannot transform myself, or anyone else for that matter. What I can do is create the conditions in which spiritual transformation can take place..."
~Ruth Haley Barton

Yum.

I made Megan's Spring Pasta tonight. I used grilled chicken instead of ham. (Though the ham sounds really good in this recipe! And I never eat ham!!)
It's a perfect dish for these longer Spring days!!! (Yay!!!!)

Weekend Links

When you want to say "I can't imagine" just try "When we say to grieving people, “Oh, I can’t imagine” we might be saying “I don’t want to imagine.” A bold post, a must read. This could apply to anyone who might be struggling or grieving.

A trifecta of Sally Clarkson must reads:

A smile in my soul--in quietness and rest
Join the sober club
I need someone who understands my life!

Baby Steps to Year Five

"Kindred spirits aren't so scarce as I used to think." ~Lucy Maud Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

Five years ago today I started a blog: "Ruminations of a Birch Mama". Kind of a lame name. *smile*

A couple of months later, I changed it to "The Flourishing Mother", and the rest, well....it's in the archives.....

That day in March 2006, I hesitantly wrote a post, and titled it: Baby Steps, inspired by this and this . I had just had my fourth child, I was "in the trenches"--home schooling my older children, trying to adjust to life with a new baby, feeling very overwhelmed, and honestly, fighting for joy. Before starting, I had no idea what blogging was or even what a blog was! During my late night reading on the computer, up with pregnancy insomnia, I discovered Barbara Curtis' blog. I was hooked on this "Montessori Megamom" of 12 children. She gave me words of hope in my mothering journey, when I so needed it, and I even participated in her Meet me in the Laundry Room! contest. (I am picture #5)

Somehow I found Amy's Humble Musings and both Barbara and Amy actually inspired me to start my own blog.

I remember "way back in the ye ole blogging days" finding a blog that Ann Voskamp wrote with Holly and a couple of other women. (anyone remember that blog?) I also discovered Tonia's blog, back when she was known as "Sparrow". *wink*

Those of you who have blogs know how they have changed lives. Not only the lives of others, but our own. By starting a blog, sharing my struggles and stories, it opened up to me the online blogging community in a way I never thought possible. I have created deep relationships with a lot of these women that I've met online. And some I've met in person--which is so very wonderful in itself.

We mamas need encouragement wherever we can find it. It is not easy being a mother, though we know it is a gift. I happened to hesitantly start a blog post, not knowing where it would lead, not even knowing what I was doing, and I have found that by taking that first "Baby Step", that I have found many, many kindred spirits that have encouraged me along the way.

So..."Happy Blogiversary to Me"!!

Will you leave me a gift? A gift of your words in the comments? I'd love to hear from you!

Blogging: God in the Yard

My Tuesday women's bible study is reading L.L. Barkat's book God in the Yard :

"the story of an unusual year, when I did something I never intended to do. But it is also a course in discovery and playing towards God, through spiritual practice, offered with gentle expectations." ~L.L. Barkat

We are lucky to have L.L. in our midst as we go through this study. She is speaking and talking about the book with us all as we read.

God in the Yard is:
the story of L.L.'s year in her own backyard.
Inspired by a prompt in a book to find a "secret spot" somewhere in nature, and go there for an hour every day, L.L. went to the same spot in her own backyard for a year. This book explains her experience in doing that.

Every Wednesday I am going to blog my thoughts about L.L.'s book and my own experiences. I have no certain way I am going to present my blog posts. Perhaps it is a long blog post, like a journal entry, perhaps it is written out like a story, perhaps it is a poem, perhaps it is a few words, or a picture. As L.L. did when she started her own journey, I am not putting any expectations on myself, or asking "why" I am doing this. I just "am".

Some thoughts on the first chapter:

L.L. invites us to read Proverbs 8: 30-31:
"Then I was beside Him as a master craftsman; And I was daily His delight, Rejoicing always before Him, Rejoicing in His inhabited world, And my delight was with the sons of men."

These verses tell me that it is good to rejoice in Him, before Him, in His inhabited world, and with the sons of men.
L.L. says, "...our spiritual goal is not simply to renew the child but to play through the child, towards soul restoration, towards a Proverbs-style partnership between us and God, preparing the way for grace in the world."

This week:

I will try to be more aware of ways to be "playful" with God. Through words, logical/mathematical ways, spatial/visual, musical/rhythmic, kinesthetic/bodily, interpersonal, intrapersonal, naturalist and existentialist ways. (God in the Yard, p. 7)

1000 gifts...

#69. a lazy afternoon with good friends
#70. learning something about myself through a conversation with a friend
#71. holding my friend's 2 week old baby girl
#72. rain melting all the snow
#73. warmer temps
#74. seeing my progress in reading the Bible
#75. starting a new study at my women's bible study (check back tomorrow!)

One Thing

"And everything is important

But everything is not

At the end of your life your relationships are all you've got."

~Sara Groves

I was talking to a friend the other day how mamas minister to each other.

"If a mom brings me a meal," my friend says, "she's walking through my door, barely balancing it with one hand, with little ones hanging on her legs. It takes all she's got and more to bring me that meal, because she herself probably needs one as well."

I always think we put "ministry" in a place that feels unattainable. We overthink ministry. What is my "ministry"? Where do I fit in? How can I minister to people? Who do I minister to?

Tonia shared a wonderful quote on her blog that I am going to repeat here. (my bold letters)

"What I have in mind for you in your new job as adult youth advisor to those seven or eight Norwegian teenagers is simply this: Invite them over to your home to cook a meal with you. Make it a regular thing, say, once every couple of weeks. And that's it.

But there is more to it than meets the eye. First, its something you like to do and are good at. You have that huge county farm kitchen, furnished with every conceivable cooking device - in a culture of fast-food and efficiency, your kitchen opens up a world of care for food and its painstaking preparation will strike them, to use one of their words, as awesome. Second, you will be taking them seriously as persons, without any condescending adaptations to their status as adolescents. You are inviting them into your adult world and making them participants in it - work that is not make-work; work, not entertainment (although not without its pleasures.) Third, you will be working out of a context of hospitality, probably the very best setting in which to develop personal relationships and develop conversations that include Jesus. [...]

You have scores of delightful and sometimes imaginatively complex recipes - they're not likely to get bored. And you will have provided a setting in which they will experience themselves in ways which are rare for them: treated with dignity, not exploited to some program or other, and treated as "souls" to be nurtured, not psyches to be fixed. [...]

I'm sure by now, you can discern the conviction that is behind my suggestion: that "ministry" is organic, growing out of who and where we are in circumstances in which we know and serve Jesus; not something we impose on a person or setting as "mission" or "evangelism" or "youth ministry."

While I see the value in "co-ordinating" ministry in churches and asking people to serve in the church, there also is a part of ministry that occurs in our everyday life which includes, as Tonia said, "is growing out of who and where we are."

Who are the people that the Lord has placed in your life? Who are those people that the Lord keeps bringing to mind? They are there for a reason. And...how can you love them? How can you minister to them?

When we let our own views or idols of ministry get in the way of what could truly be "organic" then people fall through the cracks.

"And love to me is when you put down that one more thing and say I've got something better to do..." ~Sara Groves

And ministry is messy. It's doubling a meal you make for your own family and bringing the other half to your friend. It's putting down that one more thing and choosing the better.

"There will never be an end to, the request upon your time...."

It's writing that letter to encourage a friend.

It's listening to a hurting friend when your house is crazy and the dishes are messy and you don't really want to listen... but you do.

It's listening to the voice of God say, "hey...do this. Not this."

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” ~Luke 10: 41-42

Sara Groves lyrics from the song "Just One More Thing"

Life!!!

{Lincoln center: last night}

Growing up, every weekend, we visited my grandparents' house. A lot of times we would come there in the afternoon and my grandmother, "Gaga" would be taking a rest in her bedroom. That's the first place I would go. I was always given warnings, like: "don't bother Gaga, she's resting", but I would go in there to see her anyway.

What I liked to do was lay beside her and snuggle up to her. I can still remember the way she felt and smelled. Good memories. I would always say, "Gaga, are you sleeping?" and she would say, "no honey, I'm just resting my eyes." This gave me the permission I needed to stay in there while she "rested her eyes." It gave me the assurance that I wasn't bothering her, but that she wanted me there, cuddled up next to her, as she rested.

Last night my husband took me to the Lincoln Center in New York City for a symphony concert. It's something you should try to do if ever given the opportunity. What do you do during a symphony? Watch the instruments magically play together in time? Watch the conductor's moves? Check out the "scene"? Close your eyes and "feel" the music? Sleep?

I chose to close my eyes and snuggle up to my husband. I took in his warm arm, his smell, his breath moving in and out, the feel of his wool jacket on my cheek. I gave thanks for all the wonderful things about life with him.

When my grandmother was in the nursing home in the last weeks of her life, I visited her. I cried at the sight of her: sunken cheeks, mouth drawn, eyes lost their sparkle, skinny body. She lay there and greeted me with her warm, big, smile, always ready to greet a guest. "It's a wild ride, ain't it?" she said. An odd comment coming from her, but I agreed with her, and chalked it up to her state of mind. I crawled up on her bed and snuggled up beside her like I had done so many times before. It was really amazing how it was just as I had remembered it: the way her body felt, her smell, her breathing...everything. I'm so glad I did that.

I went to see her at the mortuary where she lay in the casket. I touched her hand, but it was cold and hard, but she looked the same. "I love you, Gaga." I said. But the life was not there, and I yearned for one more time to lay with her and smell her and feel her.

Life.

#58 ears to hear music

#59 husband's arm to lean on

#60 the calm predictability of his breathing

#61 his familiar smell

#62 a warm hand to hold

#63 emotional response to music

#64 the feeling of security my husband gives me

#65 walking in heels in New York City

#66 back pain this morning! (proof my muscles work!)

#67 memories made just my husband and I

#68 the gift of Life.

Accountability

I am on Day 58 of Reading the Bible in 90 days. I will say that I would not be able to achieve this without the help of my friend Natalie. We decided to take on this challenge together and also be accountability partners in regard to this.

Natalie is an excellent accountability partner. Mainly because when she does something, she does it right. No cutting corners. Exactly the kind of accountability partner I need!!

We text each other or send an email to each other every day checking up on one another. Occasionally we will make funny comments about what we are reading, especially during the dry parts. We have also shared our favorite parts. And often she or I will text each other: "behind 2 days. Pray for me!!" or "got no reading done today!" or "you can catch up!" And we do!

I have learned during this challenge that having an accountability partner is essential to Christian living, especially when trying to overcome something or facing a challenge.

God did not leave us on this world to walk alone. He gave us Jesus and the Holy Spirit to guide us, but also our fellow believers to fellowship with and live in community with. This is an extreme blessing and should not be taken lightly.

I John 4:21 says: "And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother." This is a command that we must follow. God made us to live in community with each other, and Christian accountablity is one way we can do this.

Opening ourselves up, being real
When you choose to have an accountability partner, you are choosing to open yourself up and be vulnerable to someone. Sometimes it could be about sharing extremely sensitive or personal information. Confessing sin is part of this process, especially if you are trying to overcome something. I felt comfortable with Natalie as my accountability partner because I knew that I could tell her the truth: "I am behind by 6 days.." and she would encourage me and urge me to continue to read. Just having her support helped me read even when I did not feel like it at all. It made me not want to give up.

Relating to each other
Christian accountability involves an intentional attitude of relating to each other. We must pursue each other with intention. Deep friendship and relationships do not just "happen". They take careful thought and prayer and intention. Relationships are hard work! As an accountability partner we must be willing to be "on call" for each other, to encourage, pray, or talk to one another when we might need it. We must also communicate with each other. We cannot expect to form close bonds when we are only checking in once a week or once every 2 weeks. I found that by checking in with Natalie every day that it made me more focused on my task at hand. Frequent interaction is the key.

Ann Kroeker writes in her book Not so Fast: Slow Down Solutions for Frenzied Families:
"Intimate relationsips generally don't flourish without some dedicted time one on one. They need slow moments of focus and attention."

The Bible and Christian Accountability
The Bible says that God holds us accountable. Romans 14:12 says, "So then each of us shall give account of himself to God." This is personal accountability.
Christians are also accountable to one another. In 1 Corinthians chapter 12 it says that Christians are all part of the same body - the body of Christ - and each member needs and belongs to the other.

Galatians 6:1-2 says: "Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."

The Bible also says we should encourage each other: Hebrews 10:24 says: "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds." 1 Thessalonians 5:11 says to

"…encourage one another and build each other up…"

Asking ourselves
Are you accountable? Do you have a friend to whom you can go? Are you the type of person that people can come to when they need accountability? Do you want a Christian accountability partner?