Rejoicing

Wishing you all a wonderful Christmas!

I will be back in this space next week!

Friday five

1. My status on facebook yesterday was "mom guilt sucks". So many people wrote comments to encourage me. I know it's a common thing, but it does suck. And it's not right to have guilt over things that are not sin. All the comments just reminded me that we need each other to get through all this. Who can you encourage today?

2. Speaking of encouragement, a wonderful man in our church came up to me last Sunday and asked me "What can we do for your family?" Can I tell you how I rode on that all week? Those words, the knowing that he was thinking of us, helped me through the tough parts of the week. (And believe me, there were a lot of tough parts this week.)

3. Done with Christmas shopping. I always try to find the right balance each year of shunning consumerism but yet embracing the gift giving. I think it will always be a work in process and I'm ok with that. So thankful for

Ann Voskamp's free Jesse Tree devotional. We have done it the past 2 years and it has been so wonderful keeping our perspective where it should be this Advent season.

4. This week, I really liked this post on staying positive. Just some real good practical help for mamas.

5. What's your favorite Christmas cookie? We like this one
Happy weekend everyone!

Glorious humility

My first baby will be celebrating a birthday next week. Before I had her, I thought I knew most everything about babies. But, as we mothers all know, the more children you have, the more you learn this is not true, and you are served a big slice of humble pie.

She was 16 hours of labor, a third degree tear, and colicky. This was not my sweet angel baby I had imagined. She did not want to snuggle against me, instead, as I held her in the cradle hold, she would arch her back. I had to hold her down in my arms to get her to sleep.

I remember being in the hospital, after the birth; tired, and sore, and feeling not willing or able to care for this baby who lay beside me in the hospital crib. I remember thinking: "I want her back in there!"

Thankfully, I had a husband who was willing and able to be hands-on with the care of this baby. I don't know if I could have done it without him those first three months. I also learned more about the power of leaning on Him for strength in this mothering thing. I made more room for Him in my heart.

Today, this same daughter is my sweet soul. She is quiet, sensitive, kind, content, and helpful. She is a gem, a pearl of mine.

A few months after I had gotten settled into this mothering thing, this mothering thing of being a mother to a baby, and feeling more comfortable, I was watching Jesus of Nazareth with my husband.

The story of His birth became the most real to me as it had ever become.

I watched Mary, the mother of the King, ride on a donkey, in labor. Can you imagine?

What? No room in the inn? It's insulting that no one would make room for this heavily pregnant woman, traveling this long way with a tired husband. And this baby is the Son of God! He is God! Shouldn't God have perfect circumstances? Shouldn't Mary's labor be easy, shouldn't Jesus have the best birth accomodations? It seems ridiculous that there was no room at the inn. Shouldn't God have planned better? (You know, like I did. Baby care classes, natural birth classes, I was going to have the BEST baby and birth!)

But He did. He planned very well. He showed up in the glory of humility. And I learned it too, through the birth of my baby. I wouldn't have planned it any other way.

I am reminded of something Katherine wrote a few days ago: " God enjoys showing up when circumstances are less than ideal."

God is there, even when there seems like no room. Even when circumstances are not what you planned. He humbles, and that is the best way. It's always good to be humbled. Especially in parenting.

Today was our Christmas pageant at our church. My darling daughter shone like the angel she is and portrayed. I fixed her hair like the little girl in this picture. (I saw the end of "It's a Wonderful Life" last night.) She sang her heart out, she glowed, she was brilliant.

"Joy to the World! The Lord is come! Let Earth receive Her King! Let every Heart prepare Him room! And Heaven and Nature sing! And Heaven and Nature sing! And Heh-eh-eh-eh-eh-ven Na-Chure Sing!"

(reposted from archives, December 2006)

Multitude Monday: 1000 gifts

#231-240

The rude man working the deli counter

A nice stranger behind me

Tears

Speaking truth words to him

A response, other than rudeness, from him

Empathy from my children. "What's wrong, mama?"

A successful birthday sleepover party

Blessing my 11 (!) year old daughter

Surviving a hard week

Ending it with a pre-Christmas Christmas dinner with dear friends

Checking it twice...

She decided to make a list. This almost-11-year-old daughter of mine. Her version of who was naughty and who was nice. And this mama--me--cringed at the keeping of wrongs and rights. Me--this mama who is wounded easily by wrongs. Who struggles with forgiveness and starting over again and laying it down at His feet daily--sometimes multiple times daily.

Who holds on to hurts like a fortune teller holds a crystal ball--carefully holding it close--rubbing it and replaying the hurt over and over again...

But I've learned this way is not the way to live.

To live in a state of "tit for tat" is not a way to live as though "All is grace." To live in Grace.

I told her the list was not a good idea. That this family {tries} to live in grace and forgiveness and that we don't keep records of wrongs and rights and the Lord doesn't either so we can't either.

It's not right.

And I remember this as I argue with my 18-year-old over days--the same arguments and frustrations that keep surfacing. Lord, what can I let go of here? I'm angry but I realize just below anger is hurt and so I go to the cross--again and again--however long it takes and whatever I have to do to live in Grace and Forgiveness: being grateful, choosing to forgive, praying about what to do.

I'm learning.

Multitude Monday: 1000 gifts

#203-228

the ugly-beautiful

2 nights of homemade chocolate chip cookies

French tea and a sewing circle

13 years of marriage

linguine and clams-all eaten up

hard words shared with a teen

praying and hearing from the Lord from said words

learning to be thankful in all circumstances-practicing overcoming my soul amnesia

healing

a train ride into the city to think and reflect

brunch with 2 sister in laws

the perfect tree

the Jesse tree

"i have 2 questions, mama."

talking and learning about God's word together

seeing His story from beginning to end

another full week ahead