I have been waiting for these moments to come upon me, expecting them to appear and then take hold of them, but I am also learning that I have to build them into the foundations of this life our family is making. I have to create time set apart to be filled with the Word of the scriptures to confess my own depravity, to seek grace in quiet places so that I can cultivate grace in the busy ones.
Today, I am road building, brick laying, making grooves in my routine to fill my own heart, establishing anchors in my life that allow me to stop and rest and grow. The mother, I am finding, who does not take time to fill her own soul has very little to offer the souls in her care.
~KristenHope With Feathers
I've had this quote written down on a scrap piece of paper for awhile, stuck in an old notebook. I just bought a new journal (inspired by the lovely Aimee), and have started to fill it with quotes I've had written on scrap paper. It feels good to organize it all in one place.
I've always had a love/hate relationship with journals. What should it be for? A diary? Thoughts? Sermon notes? Grocery lists? Reminders? I've given up on all that and decided to make my journal *my thing*. It can be all of the above. I've been rising early to read the Bible in 90 days, and afterwards I will sit with my journal and pray, seeing what the Lord is laying on my heart regarding all kinds of things. I will record that. I will record thoughts I have as I am reading. I will write what I need from the grocery store. I will write down the name of someone new I met at church so I can remember next Sunday. I will take sermon notes. Basically, it's a catch-all for me.
The journal spurs me on to finding those quiet moments in the beginning of my day (the best time for me) to think and as Kristen put so well: "these places of calm are essential to remaining the woman I want to be."
The quiet time I am trying to carve out in my day did not come easily, I will say. It's been years of trying to do quiet times at all times of day, trying to rise before babies and young children, and many, many times reading the Bible in the morning with a baby or toddler on my lap. The fact is, I just try to show up for the Lord. And it's only in the last year where I've seen a little light at the end of my tunnel. So I encourage you, wherever you are on this journey of seeking quiet, that do not give up. I do know that I have given up and been hopeless many times, but I just kept showing up and trying all different kinds of ways to find that quiet in my life because I knew it was essential to my mothering and also being a woman of the Lord.
If you feel stuck, here are a compilation of links about making a journal. Perhaps it will spur you on to seek quiet in your life in order to hear Him.
100 benefits of journaling
The benefits of keeping a journal
Write it down
Journaling as a spirtual discipline
Visual homemaking journal
Setting up a visual journal