Thursday, May 30, 2013

What is edifying? Part 1.

 Titus 2: 3-5 has two parts. One; older women must be taught how to be "reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine and to teach what is good." Two; younger women must be taught how to "love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands."For me, in this "middle stage" of life, these two parts are interchangeable.  In either stage we "must be taught."

Now I know that it is important for us, as older mothers (that could be age or spiritual maturity) to "teach the younger women." Who can we look for to mentor/teach/encourage/disciple? But Titus 2 says, yes; the older women also "must be taught". Who is going to teach the older women? Who is supposed to teach the older women?

Because (in my opinion) there is a lack of discipleship/mentoring in the church, and a lack of teaching others how to disciple, we must, as "older women" look for those mentors. Seek them out, ask them.  It could be something as simple as talking to an older woman and asking her about her marriage, her relationship with the Lord. We all have something to learn from each other.

So, there is a twofold responsibility in these verses. To the older, and to the younger.

Breaking it down I see that as a woman--whether it be older or younger (again, this is not necessarily age but also spiritual maturity)-- I need to be seeking out how to be:

  • reverent in the way I live
  • not to be a slanderer. Slanderer: (defame, malign, vilify, degrade, disparage, shame, disgrace. Doesn't it take a lot of heart work for us women not to be a slanderer?)
  • not to be addicted to much wine (or facebook or my phone--ouch)
  • teach what is good
  • love my husband
  • love my children
  • to be self-controlled (goes along well with "not be addicted")
  • to be pure
  • to be busy at home
  • to be kind
  • to be subject to my husband
What stands out to me most at this time is the "self-control" part. It takes a lot of heart work to be self-controlled. Part of the way I feel I can be self-controlled (aside from the most important part which is surrendering every day to the Holy Spirit in my life) is by asking myself "What is edifying?"
Is this good for me? How will this fill me? How will this change and affect me? Again, lots of heart work to figure all this out.

In the coming week or so I want to explore that question more: "what is edifying?"
It would be great to hear comments/thoughts/questions from everyone.
Stay with me....


Anonymous said...

Ouch. You know what I'm going through right now and this really speaks to me. I'm going to be rereading this several times this week, I believe.
I especially like your take on addiction. As I have read this verse over the years and evaluated myself according to that list, addiction was always the easiest one to check off because I don't drink or use any other drugs or medicines. How narrow-minded of me! I think I need to reevaluate right now.
Am I reverent in my heart, or just in appearance?
When I seek advice does a tiny part of me relish the repeating of juicy details? (I hope not, but I need to pray about that one for sure!)
Am I addicted to ANYTHING?
Do I love my husband and children sacrificially, as Christ has loved me? Enough to bear persecution as Christ did for me?
Am I self controlled? (I know I fail here in many ways. Eating, speaking, being on time, and handling my emotions are all areas of weakness for me.)
Am I kind in word, action and thought, even if I'm having a bad day? Am I a willing subject of my husband or a willful one?
This is going to keep me busy for quite a while. Probably the rest of my life. Thank you for keeping me on my toes. :-*

Andrea said...

oh wow, you are very self-introspective!! Much more than a lot of people are.I hope that it keeps you on your toes in the sense that you are needy and will always need your Savior. He loves with much grace and compassion! And all of our exposed sin keeps us humble. Thanks for being so transparent, L.

Anonymous said...

So good Andrea, thank you! I, too, am in the middles stage and honestly, I am tired ... parenting for almost 20 years is a lot of work ;) but I am needing some reminding and inspiration so thank you!


Anonymous said...

I haven't stopped reading and am grateful for your blog. I too am convicted. I continue to see that I need a savior to change my heart. Although I can't change my circumstances, I have his daily mercies and graces and know he can change my heart. I will be reading for your humble words and biblical truths to seek his truths in being a better wife and mother. Thank you!

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